The Real Reasons I Couldn’t Sleep During Perimenopause (and What Finally Helped)
If you’ve ever found yourself wide awake at 2AM, 3AM, 4AM — mind racing, waking up in a freezing set of soaking wet sheets, wondering if you’ll ever sleep through the night again — you’re not alone. Sleep disruption in midlife is one of the most common complaints during perimenopause and menopause. And yep, hormones play a very major role.
Estrogen and progesterone — two key hormones that drop during menopause — help regulate your sleep cycle. As they decline, many women experience insomnia, restless legs, night sweats, or early morning wakeups. According to the National Institute on Aging, sleep issues affect 40–60% of women during menopause.¹
Yet it’s rarely discussed just how impossible insomnia can be to treat effectively — and what a devastating impact it can have on energy, memory, overall physical fitness, and wellness. It’s not just about missing a few ZZZs — it’s about feeling like you’re constantly running on fumes, trying to play catch-up, confused in brain fog. During perimenopause, self-care often has to center around getting as many hours of deep sleep as possible.
Here are a few practical tips that might help you sleep better:
- Sleep train yourself — or rather, re-train yourself. Get a sleep tracking device and start understanding your unique sleep patterns. I noticed that I fall asleep very fast, and when I first drift off is when I get my deepest sleep. If I miss that optimal bedtime window, it doesn’t make up for it later. Even if I get eight hours total, what really helps me feel alert and mentally sharp is hitting my ideal bedtime and getting the maximum amount of deep sleep I can. (I’ll post about memory issues soon too — they’re real.)
- Keep a food diary to uncover your food sensitivities.
When are you feeling energized? What are you eating on the nights you sleep well — or don’t? It’s common to cut caffeine, but I also found that eating a lot of sugar, refined carbs, or heavy, fatty foods close to bedtime disrupted my sleep. Those foods throw off blood sugar and just make everything feel more inflamed — especially during midlife, when your body’s already juggling hormone shifts. My sleep improved when I started paying attention to how food made me feel. - Keep your bedroom cool.
Aim for 60–67°F — hot flashes don’t like cool rooms. I keep my temp at 64°F now, but it took me a long time to dial it down from the 70°F I grew up with. What a difference! Some habits die hard. - Notice painful foot cramps at bedtime?
Try magnesium glycinate before bed — it supports relaxation and muscle recovery. During perimenopause, magnesium absorption decreases while urinary excretion increases. Chronic stress and raised cortisol from poor sleep can further deplete your levels. - Replace doomscrolling or late-night emails with a short meditation.
Blue light and mental stress (like tomorrow’s inbox) can hijack your calm. Try ambient nature sounds or soothing music with a brief meditation to ease your body and brain into sleep mode.
Real talk — here's what didn't help me sleep:
My now ex-husband, whose snoring made things much worse. Spreading myself too thin. Worrying about everyone else's problems but my own. Skipping self-care. Taking prescription meds meant for anxiety and depression not insomnia. Not paying attention to my body, and my gut. Even sleeping pills like Ambien only offered temporary knockouts — not the kind of deep, restorative sleep my body actually needed.
Getting real rest didn’t come from a pill. It came from reclaiming space for myself — and protecting my nervous system from everything that kept it stuck in fight, flight or freeze overdrive.
If you’re looking for a more traditional, medical take on this, here’s a solid overview from Johns Hopkins Medicine: How Does Menopause Affect My Sleep?
What’s helped you get better sleep in midlife?
Drop your favorite strategies or product links in the comments — supplements, habits, or playlists welcome. Got a YouTube sleep meditation or music track you swear by? Share it. Let’s crowdsource some sleep sanity.